Maybe your children have been extra needy recently, or with the beginning of summer, they have wanted to go out and do more and more things. But if you find yourself having to end every conversation as if it is a debate, you may have some children who are unwilling to accept the situation. Whether they are throwing full-blown temper tantrums or you are constantly arguing with a teen, it can feel frustrating to say the least!
Have Them Understand
Sometimes the biggest problem surrounding children who are whining or arguing is that they simply do not fully understand the situation. If they are begging for a new phone, they are not necessarily thinking about the cost of the purchase. They simply want to fit in and have the newest phone! Or if they want to go on a sleepover and won’t stop pleading, but are too young or the timing just won’t work with everybody’s schedules, they may not fully realize why you are saying no. Even younger children who simply want a toy for a toy’s sake can be talked down from a full blown temper tantrum if the situation is explained well enough, or at the very least, a compromise happens.
Be sure to explain to your children in as much detail as possible why you are saying no to a certain request. Whether it be an issue of time, space, money, or other reasons, help them to understand that you are not trying to give them a hard time. Ask them if they do understand from there, and if they have any questions. Depending on your child’s tenacity, they may continue to push the topic, but continue to stand your ground as well.
Staying Firm
It is also highly important to stay vigilant and to not give in once you have made up your mind. A whining or argumentative child may continue this behavior simply because they know they can whittle you down! But stay firm, and make sure you don’t back down for any reason, even if it does end up becoming possible to do the activity or request. This can help your children grow responsibly and to think critically when it comes to making decisions on their own in the future. It can be difficult to tell your children no, but know that it is the right call and can actually make it easier for them in the long run.
Katie Kyzivat