Sometimes your patience is wearing thin, and your children know it. What may be a simple errand or trying to get something done can turn quickly into a temper tantrum from your child. It can be hard not to create your own temper tantrum in turn, but it’s best to stay as calm as possible. In the heat of the moment, it can be difficult keeping your calm, so keep these tips and tricks handy to keep your composure. 

Of Course, Stay Calm

The absolute, best piece of advice in any temper tantrum situation is staying as calm as possible. Children are typically using a temper tantrum as a means of getting what they want, and are wanting a reaction out of you. If you also react with your emotions, it’s only feeding into what their ultimate goal of that extra piece of candy, extra game time, or refusing to go to bed. If you remain calm and explain the situation, and why you aren’t doing what they want, it can help to combat that tantrum. Remember to stay consistent all the time, no matter how militant you may feel. If your child thinks they can edge their opinion or request in and get what they want, then they will always seek a tantrum and play to those inconsistencies of your actions. 

Making Good Choices

Sometimes you can’t pick the perfect time to get something done and avoid that temper tantrum. But after explaining the situation to your child and not budging in your actions, try to see if there’s a way to allow your child to make a good choice. Let them think about it and quiet down, and they may end up deciding to stop the fight. Asking “would” questions can help your child still make a choice, rather than having to only go with your suggestion. If they are, for example, being difficult in wearing something necessary, rather than telling them they have to wear this one outfit, you may have some wiggle room. Ask “Would you like to wear the blue or the red dress shirt”? can still allow them some autonomy in the decision-making progress. And if they do happen to make a good choice or simply listen more, praise that behavior as much as you can.  

Keep in mind that kids will turn to tantrums if they can’t express their feelings as well. It may not be that serious of an issue during their tantrum, but it’s always a good idea to remember this. Your child may not really care that much, but if they can’t quite express themselves, they may get frustrated more easily.  

Katie Kyzivat